Self-sabotage Tip: Compare Yourself to Others
One of the best ways to self-sabotage, is to compare yourself to others. This not only makes you feel less-than those you admire, but superior and more entitled than those you disdain.
Comparison is a great tool to let the outside world determine your inner value. Something that you could work hard to determine yourself, but why bother when it’s so much easier to let others do it for you? The kicker with comparison, is that you don’t even need others to compare you anyone else! It’s something you can do from the privacy of your own brain as often and as harshly as you like.
When you compare yourself to those you admire, you remind yourself that regardless of all the hard work and rejection and failures they had to endure, they are way smarter, talented, creative, insightful, brave, and richer than you are, and that’s all that matters really. The wonderful result of this, is that it lets your ego talk you into lowering your standards for yourself. After all, “you’ll never be as good as your idols,” so it’s okay to settle for less.
If comparing yourself to those you admire doesn’t work for you, fear not, there’s a comparison self-sabotage for you! Just compare yourself to those who are not as talented or creative or smart as you. This will ensure you will feel good about yourself by seeing others as less-than. This will be a powerful tool for your ego to constantly remind you that you deserve more than those beneath you. As long as you can tolerate a great deal of jealousy, spite, gossip, bitterness and resentment, you’ll do just fine.
Comparison as a tool for self-sabotage is also great, in that it takes you out of the present. By projecting you into the future of where you wish you were, or keeping you in the past lamenting on decisions you should have made to land that sitcom—instead of it going to that hack Jennifer—you avoid having to funnel that energy into what you could be doing now to better your circumstances. For this, your ego will thank you greatly!
Do you love downplaying to others your value and abilities? Then oh, boy! Is comparison right for you! There’s almost no greater feeling than the satisfaction of making sure others don’t perceive you as anything greater than the people you admire. As long as they know, that you’ll never be like Tesla, or DaVinci, or your immigrant grandmother, you escape the inevitable egg-on-your-face moment when the whole realizes what you’ve known all along. So keep playing that shit down and remember, the lower the bar, the farther your have to go towards greatness.
The final note on comparison happens to be a personal favorite. See what everyone in your field of interest is doing to succeed, and do only that. Clearly what works for one, works for all! If that weren’t true, why else would everyone be doing it? Push aside the nagging fact that there are a lot of people pursuing the same thing as you and not succeeding; it’s clearly not because of their proven approach. Following the herd keeps your ego safe from standing out and being criticized, regardless of whether or not the herd’s approach works for you. So look at how everyone is working, and if it isn’t working for you just remind yourself, you’re probably just lacking something else like drive, passion, knowledge, ability, creativity, boldness.
If any of this resinates with you, great! You’re on your way to a fantastic life of repetitive self-sabotage, safety and smallness. Feel free to follow for more tips and share your favorite ways to self-sabotage!
